Food Review: B&G Pickles

I enjoy B&G’s pickles so much that I have been known to actually carry one or two in my pocket. Not for long, just enough so that they warm up a bit and they won’t bother my sensitive teeth. For some reason people think that that is humorous, and I am frequently asked “Is that a pickle in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?” Of course the answer is usually both. But I must not have been the first to think of this, because people seem able to instantly identify the lump in my pocket as a pickle.

I think it speaks volumes about the quality of B&G’s pickles that some of their patrons will actually carry them around in their pockets. Perhaps they could make pocket-sized jars, so that people could have multiple pickles in their pockets! They could use it as an ad slogan too: “B&G pickles: so good you’ll want a pickle in your pocket!”

I can’t really explain why, but I’ve noticed that women talk to me more when I have a B&G’s pickle in my pocket. I don’t know if it possibly emits some kind of pheromonic aroma or maybe it’s just that my disposition becomes sunnier knowing that I will soon be crunching vigorously into a B&G’s pickle, but if you’re not having much luck there, maybe you could try it.